A month ago, I had a reunion with my alumni from the college. Most of them were my friend, and we had a little bit of conversation about status regardless of what is it about. I was asked by many of them about my job status. The first question, What are you doing now? Where do you work? How’s life? Married?
. Honestly, if you put me in a ranking, I’ll be the lowest among them. But still, I answer their questions in a friendly tone.
I know they were being friendly and wanted to know what is their friend’s progress in life. I can understand it and appreciate knowing there’s a friend who always looks out for you. I did not get mad or being hurtful by that. Somehow, that reminds me of the same question that was asked to me by some people that think they know me better.
At first thinking of what happening throughout my whole life for the past years, I am very fortunate because I had the chance to be living while still facing the troubles in front of me. I had this moment where I felt like I was falling behind, I am not good enough, and I don’t see the light through the darkness. So many people were talking behind my backs saying something that hurtful, I tried to feel okay but I guess I am not strong enough. I think that is how the human works. No trouble then no solution. I think it’s unique in how this whole thing happening in my life. Being treated by people who think they should rule your world is not a memory that I would like to keep.
It is a struggle of life especially when you had to confront all the people who think that you might not make it through. I tried my best to hide all of my expressions and my feelings so that I am not making any scene. However, to do so, it takes so much courage and patience. It has been painful for the past years because I’ve been compared with my other friend about everything in my life. And the truth is, I am jobless, broke, and still living in the same place since I was little. I never got the chance to see the world around me. Being compared with them who are much successful than you is worst.
Little that I know, being in that situation actually makes you feel stronger. If only if you push yourself and do something that you think you good at. We are living in this world not based on what people define us. Of course, everybody can judge us but not everybody can do what we do in our own specialty. Even though we felt like we are falling behind, and people see us like no future at all, just remember that we are still progressing. Nevertheless, we are not achieving a certain level yet. So, just give it time for yourself, for ourselves. Our time will come soon, but in the meantime, enjoy the progress.